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’ ‘Why do you say that? It seems you and your wife separately deliver your children’s needs although you’re not committed to her.’ ‘And the children suffer. But you win. I don’t want more commitment. Commitment is bad because it means you’re not self-sufficient and others might let you down.’ He turns away from her searching gaze and doesn’t like this conversation. He has no wish to explain to Hazel why he’s no longer committed to Caroline. His failed marriage, for him, is a humiliation and not a proper subject for discussion. And he’s frustrated with himself because what he’d really like is a little sympathy for his plight and for her to show he matters to her. Pathetic. Beyond that, he struggles to understand what he wants from Hazel. She’s not easy by any meaning of the word and yet he looks forward to her company. Is it because he’s lonely or because he needs a relationship to prove he’s not a failure? He even wonders whether he’s instinctively searching for a partner to help. So, I wanted to see a clothed picture of them both. I told them that if they wanted to blur out the faces, that was fine. This clothed picture request proved to be important because, it was different from what the other catfish were doing. The husbands would tell me that they got lot of fake messages from horny guys pretending to be women. The guys could barely spell and asked for nudes right away. So, by not immediately bringing up sex and asking for a clothed picture, they instantly felt comfortable with me. After a few days I had exchanged pictures with a few couples. I found this exhilarating. I was also terrified. I had never done anything like this and I was sure that the local police were tracking my every move! I was sure the police were going to bust into my hotel room at any moment and arrest me!But, the fear was also part of the thrill. After three days of e-mailing with husbands, I found one I made a connection with. The husband asked me to video chat with him and his.
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